Therapist in McKinney Texas Archives – Foundations Counseling

facts about couples counseling

The Facts About Couples Therapy

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There are a lot of couples therapy misconceptions. If you need a professional to help re-build your relationship, read this guide.

There is no such thing as a perfect relationship, even if you’ve been together for 50 years. But despite the fact that divorce rates have been hovering between 40 to 50 percent, there’s still hope for couples who have a strong desire to make it work.

Recent research revealed 75 percent of couples who did couples therapy believed they were “better off” after counseling. Sixty-five percent reported “significant” improvement in their relationship. And two years later, 50 percent of couples who sought therapy were still going strong.

Although some experience anxiety wondering if therapy will help you stay together, that’s the risk you must be willing to take. Seeing a couples therapist is a healthy way to explore your relationship patterns. It can also help you get unstuck from any issues that keep coming up.

Better communication with your partner is the ultimate goal. Consider therapy an investment in both your relationship and your mental health. Continue on to learn more about how couples therapy can work for you.

What is Couples Therapy?

Couples therapy, or marriage counseling, helps couples resolve conflicts. Partners learn ways to enhance their relationship with better communication tools and listening strategies. A licensed marriage counselor or psychotherapist helps guide couples through the process.

Treatment is on a short-term basis but sometimes can develop into long-term given the circumstances.

Common Misconceptions About Couples Therapy

When a couple decides to seek help for their relationship, it is a positive step in the right direction. Although relationship counseling is beneficial, sometimes unrealistic expectations can crop up.

A few common misconceptions about couples therapy that might prevent a couple from seeking therapy are:

1. One Person is Blamed for Most of the Relationship Issues

It’s common to avoid counseling for fear of getting blamed for relationship problems. Except for abuse or addiction history, an experienced therapist will take a fair and balanced approach to treatment.

2. Needing Individual Treatment Before Couples Counseling

Many couples put off relationship counseling because they believe they should deal with their own issues first. But that isn’t necessarily so. In fact, working on your relationship issues can pave the way for better communication and help decrease stress and anxiety.

3. We’ve Had These Issues For Years – Change is Unrealistic

No matter how many years you’ve been together, sometimes bad patterns and habits develop. This evolves into a dysfunctional relationship, which means the relationship focuses more on arguments, blame, fear, insecurities, and miscommunication.

But being in a dysfunctional relationship is not a completely hopeless situation. Relationship counseling helps with some of these patterns and redirects you toward more positive interactions and behaviors with each other.

Who Benefits from Couples Therapy?

Whether you are in a same-sex marriage, long-term relationship, or are engaged to be married, there are numerous benefits of seeking therapy. Some couples seek therapy because they have fallen into unhealthy communication patterns. Others require therapy as a tool to help them overcome a tragic event such as a death in the family or issues with addiction.

Below are several common reasons to seek relationship therapy:

  • Communication problems
  • Cheating
  • Physical abuse
  • Extended family issues
  • Financial problems
  • Control issues
  • Anger management
  • Sexual incompatibility
  • Drug or alcohol addiction
  • Death in the family
  • Child rearing issues

There are more issues that can crop up for couples seeking treatment, but these are among the most frequently addressed.

How Does Couples Therapy Work?

After mutually agreeing upon a therapist, a couple begins treatment with weekly therapy sessions. The sessions last about an hour, with the therapist asking the couple key questions about the relationship and any ongoing issues.

At the first meeting, the therapist asks the couple why they are there and gets background information on the relationship. Sometimes a questionnaire is given before the first meeting. This helps address any previous issues during the first few sessions.

Depending on what style is right for you, your therapist might give you “homework” to do at home with each other. This could range from reading a chapter of the same marriage counseling book to practicing active listening exercises.

What is the Role of Couples Therapist?

The therapist’s role is often multi-faceted. In the role of mediator, they help guide the relationship into better communication territory.

As mediator (or referee as some claim), a therapist can provide an objective view of the relationship without taking sides. By devoting a fair amount of time to each patient, they help individuals address their relationship issues in a safe environment.

A therapist also acts as a teacher and helps model positive communication. Their observation skills help therapists make assessments based on their professional training.

If arguments occur during a session, an experienced therapist helps guide the couple with keeping conflict resolution. Better communication tools are offered for couples in a calm and controlled environment.

How Relationship Counseling Helps

The benefits for couples attending relationship counseling are numerous. With the primary focus on improved communication, most couples are also able to achieve the following:

  • Learn active listening skills
  • Tackle issues together with the guidance of a professional therapist
  • Address dysfunctional patterns and work through them
  • Develop a heightened awareness of partner’s concerns in an objective way
  • Support each other in new ways
  • Strengthen communication skills by deconstructing negative patterns

Although new communication skills are beneficial to couples, sometimes pitfalls can happen.


Unfortunately, there is no guarantee that couples therapy will solve your relationship problems. Counseling sessions sometimes reveal a person’s painful past in ways that might feel too vulnerable to continue. Sometimes a couple will discover they do not want to stay together after all and break up.

Although these can be some couples greatest therapy fears, choosing to get help is the best plan.

How to Find a Great Couples Therapist

One of the most important things you can do for your relationship is to invest in treatment. But how do you take that first important step to finding the right therapist? Here are a few things to consider:

Start with referrals. Referrals are a great way to find a therapist, so ask friends, doctors, and neighbors. Look online, too.

Define your needs with your partner. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page about your therapist qualifications. Do you need someone with a religious affiliation? Is there a preference for male or female?

Make an appointment for a consultation. To find the best fit, it’s often helpful to speak with the therapist in person, or by telephone, to get a feel for their style.

Check their credentials. Background and experience are very important so confirm a potential therapist’s licensing and affiliations. Also, check if there have been any complaints or disciplinary actions filed against them.

We understand that choosing to seek counseling is a big decision and should not be taken lightly. It can be a big step to get you on the path to healing old wounds and starting anew.

When you and your partner are ready to find a therapist, we are here for you.

What to Expect in Grief Counseling (And Is It Right for You?)

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After losing a loved one, therapy can help you process your emotions. Read on to learn what to expect in grief counseling and whether it’s right for you.

Grief counseling is a specialized type of therapy that aims at helping people who have experienced the loss of a loved one. Sessions focus on assisting people with working through their sadness, dealing with lingering guilt, and learning the coping mechanisms that can help them move forward with their lives.

Keep reading to learn what to expect in grief counseling and whether it’s right for you.

How Long is the Process?

While grief counseling doesn’t follow the same timeline in every person, it’s not a usually a permanent therapy. Grief counseling is recommended for anyone who has lost a loved one. Young or old, this form of therapy works for anyone working through loss–whether that’s a parent, sibling, spouse, or friend.

Grief counseling is also called bereavement counseling, but the latter term refers to loss through death only. Grief can involve the loss of a person through a breakup or divorce or some other situation.

Learning About Grief

Part of counseling is learning about the grief process and what to expect as you cope with a major loss. During therapy, people are taught the normal grieving process, including familiar feelings and thoughts.

Patients learn how to distinguish what normal grieving looks like, as compared to other mental health conditions normal grieving and other conditions, such as depression, that can develop from grieving.

Many therapists go through the five stages of grief, which are there to help you identify the various forms your grief will take as you cope with the loss.

Normal feelings associated with grieving include fear, anxiety, disbelief, anger, and sadness. Additionally, some people feel physical pain during this period of grief.

What You Can Expect to Do in Grief Counseling

Whether you choose group therapy, individual, or both, here are some of the things you can expect to cover in grief therapy.

1. Work on Expressing Feelings

In grief counseling, people learn to express what they are feeling, no matter what that looks like. Sometimes, this step is difficult for those who have trouble expressing emotions, but learning to talk about grief is an important part of the process.

In therapy sessions, patients may be asked to talk to the deceased, as though they were sitting right there. Or, they may be asked to write letters that express thoughts and feelings left unsaid.

Other ways to get in touch with feelings include looking at photos or visiting a gravesite, or and remembering the lost loved one or object or visiting the grave of a loved one who has died.

2. Becoming Open to New Relationships

This part of the counseling process is there to help people move forward with their lives. This element of counseling helps people view their relationship to the deceased through a different lens.

While the memories of a loved one last a lifetime, talking to someone can help people learn to how to incorporate the past with the changes that come in the future. Part of bereavement counseling serves to help the patient keep their hearts open to new relationships–romantic or otherwise.

3. Find a New Identity

During the duration of therapy, the patient must also work through their identity. People view themselves through the relationships they have. A woman may identify as a wife, but when her husband passes away, that identity changes.

Or a person who has lost both of their parents may feel that they are no longer someone’s son or daughter. In any case–part of the grieving process is understanding how these losses can affect our identity.

Patients may find new purpose in focusing their energy on other existing relationships–strengthening friendships after losing a spouse. Other may find doing volunteer work to helps fill a need to care for others.

When it’s Not Just Grief

Grief is not a mental disorder. Though it looks like depression, the pain is usually temporary, and something everyone goes through at one point or another.

When someone you care about dies, you can expect to feel sad, angry, confused, but if these feeling do not go away, you may need some extra support.

It’s not as if we go through all these stages and then come out the other side all shiny and new and ready to get back on with life. Loss stays under the surface of our lives and continues to permeate long after it first happened. Sometimes all it takes is a specific date, a place, or a song, for all of that grief to come surging back.

Symptoms of depression include insomnia, sadness, changes in appetite, weight loss, and fatigue. If you think you may be depressed, ask your grief counselor for a referral.

Grieving? Call Foundations Counseling Today

Ultimately, grief counseling serves as a way to help patients transition from a dark period marked by loss, to a new, productive path forward. And, arguably the best way to honor someone you love, is to live your best life, rather than continuing the bereavement process.

Of course, getting better takes work, and in many cases, a major time investment. In therapy, patients will uncover the deep emotions they are experiencing during the process. From there, they’ll learn to cope with those emotions and live a normal life.

There is no need to grieve the loss of a loved one alone. If you need help getting through this difficult time, contact us today.


Sleep, appetite, Irritability,

5 Signs of Depression

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Following a particularly difficult day or a stressful situation, we have all found ourselves feeling a little off. Or perhaps more upset than usual. It’s human nature to respond to life’s stressors emotionally. Sometimes the reaction is more extreme than merely sadness or feeling upset over events and it is actually a medical conditions known as depression, which requires treatment from a qualified healthcare professional.

There is more than one reason that can cause a person to become depressed. It can affect anyone at any time. Research has shown, however, narrowed down several factors that can increase a person’s odds of becoming depressed. Whether it’s the weather, hormones, our own brain, childhood trauma or loneliness contributing to an increased probability of depression, they all come into play.


During the long winter months, the sun is much further away from the Earth. This leads to people spending less time outdoors and have less sunshine in their lives. This has been linked to more cases of depression during the winter months. Humans are able to think more clearly during the spring (find something to cite). A lack of sunshine can also lead to a Vitamin D deficiency, which has also been linked to an increased likelihood of depression, according to a study by Hoogenkijk. (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18458202)


How many times have you found yourself at a social event and things are not going the way you wanted? Whether you feel slighted socially, disappointed or the person you wanted to talk to isn’t there, these little daily occurrences add up. Sometimes our brains take these disappointments and begin a negative inner dialogue that exacerbates the situation. Its human nature to set up expectations for ourselves and sometimes these expectations are not met. This is naturally unsatisfactory but, that inner voice can make it so much worse. We have a tendency to compare yourself to those around you and feel cheated out of status, money, friends, etc.

Once that little voice starts talking, telling you how much you have failed and that no one likes you, you’re heading for more than sadness. Add on all the little stresses of daily life piling up on you while this voice is talking, your stress hormones will go into overdrive.  This is the perfect recipe for depression.


While some people are more prone to respond to stress with depression, there are certain childhood factors that can increase someone’s odds of struggling with depression more than their peers. Abuse, poverty, trauma and a death of a loved one during childhood can contribute to a person being less capable of brushing off stress easily. This increases your likelihood to go into a fight, flight or freeze when faced with challenges.


Humans are social creatures. We crave belonging to a social group. When we find ourselves without community, it can lead to depression.

We are all human and it is inevitable that life will not always go our way and we will find ourselves hurt and stressed out. Even though it is possible to shut down the negative voice in our heads, that initial comment can hurt. With all these factors going on, it’s important to be well versed in the symptoms of depression so you can recognize if you’re sad or depressed.

Depression is more than feeling blue and crying. Here are 5 symptoms of Depression so you can pinpoint if what you’re feeling needs medical attention.

1. Irritability

Do you find yourself flying off the handle much more than usual? Reactions that are bigger than the situation calls for may be an often overlooked symptom of depression

“Where there is anger, there is always pain underneath.” –Eckhart Tolle

2. Change in Appetite

Another common sigh that you may be experiencing more than sadness and are depressed is a change in your eating habits. Whether you are eating too little or too much and it has led to a significant weight gain or weight loss, those are both symptoms of depression.

3. Sleep Patterns

Staying in bed all the time and finding it difficult to get up and participate in normal, daily activities is a more well-known symptom of depression. The lesser known counterpart is finding yourself unable to sleep and getting far too little rest is another symptom of depression.

4. Isolation

When life is not going our way, its human nature to pull away while we are hurting. It becomes a sign of something more serious when the isolation is extensive and causing complications with family, friends and daily activities. When you are not just pulling away to tend to a wound but remain isolated from your life that is a sign of depression.

5. Tasks

We all have days where the laundry piles up and the dishes are stacked high in the sink. It can feel overwhelming. Those are normal, universal things we all face. It becomes a sign of depression and could become more problematic if you are consistently overwhelmed with daily tasks and find yourself unable to start of complete tasks.

“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.” –Ernest Hemmingway

Whatever factors are causing your depression, it’s important to understand what’s going on and look for the common symptoms in order get the treatment to help you resume your daily activities. You are not alone in this. At Foundations Counseling, we can help

Foundations Counseling| http://www.yournewfoundation.com/ | 469.215.0314 | 6401 Eldorado Parkway Ste. 210 McKinney, Texas 75070


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Anxiety Attack Vs Heart Attack: How To Know The Difference

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Experiencing symptoms of a panic attack for the first time can be scary and confusing. Know the difference between an anxiety attack vs heart attack.

If you experience pain in your chest accompanied by shortness of breath, you may immediately become concerned that you are having a heart attack.

However, these are also common symptoms of a panic or anxiety attack. Knowing the difference can make the crucial difference between life and death.

Here are five important facts to consider in weighing the question: anxiety attack vs heart attack?

1. Anxiety Attack Vs Heart Attack: The Symptoms are Similar

It is true that in determining anxiety attack vs heart attack, the two conditions share many similar symptoms.

Both attacks may entail the following:

  • Pain in the chest area
  • Shortness of breath
  • palpitations
  • nausea or vomiting
  • sweating
  • fainting
  • upper body pain

To make things even more confusing (and anxiety-provoking), symptoms of heart failure can include anxiety!

If you believe that you or your loved one is actually experiencing heart failure, you should go directly to an emergency room.

A trained physician will often be able to tell right away whether it is a heart attack or not.

Those who have a history of heart disease or have suffered heart failure before should contact a doctor right away if they are experiencing these symptoms again.

2. Women Are At Special Risk

The Anxiety and Depression Association of America states that women’s symptoms of heart disease are often mistaken for anxiety. This places them at a higher risk of not getting the medical attention they require.

Many people seem to mistakenly associate heart disease with men and anxiety with women. However, these stereotypes are dangerous and misleading.

A female having a heart attack will also experience chest pain, plus she is more likely to also have shortness of breath, nausea and vomiting and other pains in areas like the back or jaw.

It’s important not to assume that one gender is more likely to experience an anxiety attack vs. heart attack. Men are just as vulnerable as women to the same stressors that cause panic attacks: trauma, divorce and relationship issues, grief and loss.

3. Unusual Symptoms to Watch Out For

Fainting is an important sign that the attack in question is a heart attack. Generally, anxiety attacks do not cause a loss of consciousness.

Usually, if someone having an attack and is able to calm down their breathing, their other bodily symptoms will also abate.

Unconsciousness, on the other hand, does not just go away. Call 911 immediately if someone suffering these symptoms also loses consciousness.

On the other hand, some symptoms are only associated with anxiety attacks. Numbness or tingling extremities are not usually associated with heart failure.

If someone is feeling pins and needles in their limbs, this may indicate they need to seek help for a panic-related disorder.

Other physical signs of a panic attack include tightness in the throat or feeling. like you are choking on something. Panic can also cause your knees to buckle or give way.

These signs usually happen with panic attacks but do not usually signal a heart issue.

4. Which Came First: the Anxiety or the Palpitations?

Doctors will seek the origin of the symptoms which determine anxiety attack vs heart attack.

Because anxiety can lead to heart problems, a physician will ask whether something worrisome happened to provoke the rapid heart rate?

Or was it the other way around?

An irregular heart rhythm or arrhythmia can actually make a person feel anxious. But a fast or irregular heart rate may not be caused by panic but by a physical anomaly.

People with these issues should undergo heart monitoring to determine the cause of their symptoms. Luckily, many modern smartphones have applications which will allow you to easily monitor your daily heartbeats for signs of irregularities They will also allow you to see what affects the rhythm.

If an irregular heartbeat does not seem to be affected by external triggers like a call from the boss or a fight with the wife, the cause may be physiological.

If it is a cardiac problem instead of a psychological one, there are medical procedures like ablations which can help.

5. Both Kinds of Attacks are Treatable

If you realize that you are suffering anxiety, tightness in the chest, shortness of breath and feelings of fear, do not give up hope. There are many suitable treatments for men and women who suffer from crippling anxiety.

Some people find relief through changing their dietary intake, such as by reducing caffeine and sugar. Symptoms may also be exacerbated by other medications being taken for other conditions, so cutting those out or replacing them may help.

Some therapists may prescribe various medications such as antidepressants or anti-anxiety pills, also known as benzodiazepines.

Talk therapy is frequently very successful in treating anxiety attacks.

Many people find numerous benefits from counseling. A psychologist can provide an open, honest and safe forum to discuss issues from the past or present which may be causing you distress.

He or she can also help you build coping skills and strategies which can prevent panic attacks before they happen, and show you how to deal with the many triggers which cause emotional upheaval.

Once you determine whether the cause of your attacks is cardiac or psychological, you are on well your way to finding the best type of help to prevent future episodes.

Panic Attack vs. Heart Attack: Know the Difference

It is critical to first diagnose what is causing your physical and emotional distress. Scan the outward symptoms of your own body (or the person who is suffering).

Check for any exterior triggers or indications of an emergency cardiac situation (such as fainting).

Once a heart attack has been ruled out, seek help from the professional field most suited to handle the condition in question.

If the heart palpitations and other issue seem to arise from an internal physical cause unrelated to emotional stress, find a cardiologist.

If, on the other hand, the symptoms arise from emotional triggers, you may need to seek help from a licensed counselor.

There is no need to suffer in silence: help is available. If you need more information on how to cope with panic attacks and stress, contact us.

Am I depressed

Depression vs Sadness: How to Tell the Difference

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While it may seem that everyone throws around “The D Word” from time to time, specific depressive disorders affect less than 10% of Americans.

However, the combination of anxiety, trauma, and illnesses that can contribute to depression make depression much more common.

If symptoms are mild, you may want to understand whether you’re simply feeling sad or experiencing depression.

While you might think of sadness as temporary and depression as persistent, it can be hard to differentiate the two in the moment.

Your experience could feel like it may pass, but you could be experiencing the early feelings of a mild depressive bout. Alternately, you could be in the throes of one of the worst dark clouds you’ve experienced which you might not realize is connected to an event in your life.

If you’re wondering whether you’re feeling sad or experiencing clinical symptoms of depression, you’re not alone. Ask yourself these 5 questions to shed a little light on your feelings.

1. If You’re Feeling Sad, Are Your Favorite Things Enjoyable?

Everyone has a handful of things that really make life worth living. Whether it’s traveling abroad, spending the day at your favorite bookshop, or just that chai latte you like, there are things that can take us out of any funk.

If you’re feeling sad, these are the things that can shake us out of our feelings or reassure us that we’ll move beyond the hurdle in front of us. Our brain might resist the good feelings, but in the end, positivity will prevail.

In the experience of depression, there’s an inability to enjoy the things that once were pleasurable.

This reaction is called an “anhedonic” reaction, as in the inverse of the hedonism we feel when on a beach with the perfect drink in hand. Depression inhibits those feelings of pleasure that could cut through the fog of our sad feelings.

When you can’t seem to enjoy the things that “should” make you happy, you could be feeling depressed.

2. Are Your Emotions Tied To One Specific Thing?

During moments of feeling sad, it’s hard to tell where that sadness comes from. You could wake up in the morning, stare at the clock knowing it’s time to get up, and just not be able to do it.

What makes this a symptom of sadness as opposed to depression is its connection to something specific.

If you’ve experienced a major change in your life, like a breakup, job loss, death of a loved one, or even a move to a new city, you could be experiencing sadness.

While this disconnection from something that you once identified closely with can feel traumatic, it may pass. In moments of sadness, we can usually say “I guess it started when…”

This is a tricky concept, however.

If we have deep trauma tied to loss that can trigger depression, that event might have just reopened that issue for you. Your depression may have started off in the way sadness does, but if it opens you up to a deeper negativity, that sadness may have paved the way for depression.

If you’ve had issues with depression in the past, you need to be especially aware when traumatic events happen or appear to be on the horizon. If you know that a loved one is going to pass soon and have dealt with depression due to loss, contact a trusted therapist in advance.

While depression can hit for “no reason at all”, the conditions of a sad event can make it easier for depression to take over your life.

3. Are You Sleeping And Eating Normally?

When you’re unhappy, it can be hard to follow your normal rules. Sometimes a little exercise and fresh air can help make things better and get you back on track.

If being more active doesn’t tire you out for a good night’s sleep and build up a little hunger, you might be experiencing depression. One of the major features of depression is insomnia and the inability to fix it with standard tactics.

For some people, food might seem “pointless” in the haze of sadness that comes with depression. You might feel like it’s not worthwhile to be healthy or in some cases to eat at all.

If you can’t seem to resolve your appetite or sleep schedule, contact a counselor who can help you find tactics to help combat your brain’s attempts to undermine you.

4. Does Your Mood Fluctuate?

When you’re feeling sad, it might seem like your mood fades in and out, like background music that takes over a movie scene. When there’s space for you to let go of your sadness and enjoy things, you’re likely not experiencing severe depression.

For people who experience even the most moderate symptoms of depression, it’s less like background music and more like a refrigerator hum.

Even in the quietest of times, it’s still there. And if you focus on it, it can be deeply upsetting or frustrating.

With the most severe forms of depression, any task can seem punishingly difficult. You can get upset talking to the person you’re ordering coffee from, irritated with the people on the train, and everyone at work can seem unbearable.

When the common denominator between unrelated people and events is your frustration, sadness, anxiety, or anger, talk to someone about dealing with depression.

5. Are You Self-Sabotaging?

While everyone has moments where they definitely screwed up or their performance at school or work stinks, they are often few and far between.

If these mistakes or missteps arise when you’re feeling sad, you can usually bet that you can avoid those mistakes the second time around.

During a bout of depression, your thoughts can become habitual or cyclical. You might feel like you failed, and you failed because you’re incapable, and you will never get any better. You might punish yourself with your negative thoughts.

If you blame yourself for things that are out of your control or you’re relentlessly critical of yourself, you may be experiencing depression. If you have a firm belief that it’s some critical flaw that you’re hardwired with that is keeping you from success, talk to someone about dealing with depression.

In all likelihood, your talent and skills have gotten you this far, but now depression has taken the wheel. Before it steers you into a ditch, set yourself up for success by contacting a counselor to help with depression.

There’s Nothing Abnormal About Feeling Sad or Experiencing Depression

There are millions of people who are feeling sad and millions more also experiencing depression. Thankfully there are many trained experts who know how to help us get back on track.

If you’ve thought about self-harm or violence, speak to a professional as soon as possible. Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255 (1-800-273-TALK) 24/7. The Crisis Text Line is a way to get help anonymously through text.

There is always someone there to listen to you no matter what you’re going through. Cut through the fog and seek help today.

Marriage Counseling

Do You Need Marriage Counseling? (And Will it Work?)

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 It can be hard to admit when you need help with your relationship. Here’s how to identify if you and your spouse need marriage counseling.

Are you having problems in your marriage?

Marital distress can be a painful experience for both parties. It can be tempting to try to overcome hurdles on your own. But doing so can lead to even more problems or worse, divorce.

If you’re having issues with your husband or wife, it might be time to consider marriage counseling.

Counseling can help with all types of marital distress and help you get back on track with your spouse.

It can help you rekindle your flame by coaching you on tips for a successful marriage.

In fact, approximately 70 percent of couples recover within three months of therapy.

But how do you know it’s time for therapy? It can be hard to admit when you need help with your relationship.

Here’s how to identify if you and your spouse need marriage counseling.

1. Infidelity

Having an affair can be one of the most damaging factors in a relationship. Only about 31 percent of marriages last after an affair has been admitted or discovered.

The presence of infidelity is a telltale sign that your relationship is in trouble. Overcoming an affair is hard work, but it’s not impossible.

As long as both parties are committed to marriage counseling, the relationship has potential to be saved.

You should also consider coaching if you experience warning signs of infidelity. It’s best to get help as soon as possible if you’re fantasizing about or have the desire to cheat.

Take a proactive approach and diagnose your problems before it’s too late.

2. Communication Issues

Communication is a key part of any relationship. Relationships are built upon the ability to understand one another and talk through issues.

Marriages can often crumble when communication is poor.

Communication issues look a lot different from couple to couple. Maybe you are keeping secrets, avoiding each other, or constantly arguing.

Negative communication can be just as damaging as no communication. This is communication that leaves one partner feeling hurt. They might feel depressed, inferior, afraid, or marginalized after a negative conversation.

Couples therapy can help by coaching you to use new communication methods and techniques. A therapist can help you open up and bring back honesty to your relationship.

3. Fear

Have you ever been afraid in your relationship? If the answer is yes, it’s time to seek help.

Fear comes in many different forms. Obviously, fear of emotional or physical abuse should be handled very seriously.

Are you afraid of bringing up your feelings? Maybe you have a problem but are too afraid to bring it up to your spouse. Maybe you’re afraid of being judged or put down.

Fear can be damaging to relationships. It can hinder communication and lead to further issues down the road.

A marriage counselor will help by coaching you through these issues. It’s their job to be an impartial party and reserve judgment no matter how big your problems are.

4. Lack of Affection

The honeymoon stage can’t last forever. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have affection in your relationship.

It can be normal for married couples to struggle with their sex life. Even the most passionate couples can fall into a rut every so often.

But big changes to your sex life can also be a red flag. Affection still plays an important role in relationships. If your sex life is crumbling, a marriage counselor can help you reignite your flame.

You should also seek counseling if affection is being purposefully withheld.

A partner should not withhold affection as a form of punishment. This behavior can be hurtful and a sign of inequality in a relationship.

5. Financial Troubles

Finances are the leading cause of stress in relationships. Even the strongest marriages aren’t immune to financial burdens.

Financial issues can be a painful topic to discuss. As a result, many couples are not on the same page when it comes to money.

You might hide transactions from one another. You might have different budgets or avoid having serious conversations about money.

Marriage counseling can help you and your spouse get back on financial track. You can begin to have more open conversations about budgeting, saving, and spending.

Financial troubles can affect the rich and poor. A marriage counselor can help you and your spouse get on the same financial track.

6. Recurring Arguments

Your idea of marital bliss probably doesn’t include arguments. But arguments are a part of married life.

How do you know when you’re having too many arguments? One clear-cut sign is that you’re having recurring arguments.

Are you arguing over the same topics time after time? Has nothing changed?

It might be time to seek marriage counseling.

Recurring arguments can be frustrating for both parties. One spouse is clearly annoyed about something and continues to vent this frustration. The other spouse might feel attacked and confused about why these conversations keep occurring.

Recurring arguments might seem like they’re about something minor.

In reality, they might be about a deep-seeded issue. A marriage counselor can help you realize why these fights keep happening. They will help by coaching you to better communication.

7. Unresolved Issues

Compromise is a vital term to any relationship. Both spouses should have their needs equally met in a marriage.

Too much compromise can cause long-term, unresolved issues. These are issues that can ruin relationships over the course of years or even decades. They can be fundamental differences about families, children, finances, religion and more.

Unresolved issues can eat away at a marriage. Marriage counseling can help you get over these hurdles, no matter how impossible that might seem.

Therapy can help you better understand your spouse’s point of view.

You can work together to resolve even the biggest of differences of opinion.

Your Marriage Counseling

Marital distress can affect even the strongest couples. If these signs are familiar to you, a marriage counselor can get you and your spouse back on track.

Are you interested in learning more about marriage counseling? We can help.

We offer pre-marital, marital counseling and couples counseling to help in all stages of your relationship. Contact us today to get started.